The ability to gain and keep trust is a vital factor in being able to influence others. Research has shown, time and time again, that trust is always a contributing factor in the ability to influence others. When a person trusts you, trust alone can cause them to accept your message. On the flip side, if people dont trust you, all the evidence, reasoning, facts, or figures in the world wont get them to budge. Trust can be an ambiguous concept, but certain things are quite clear: You cant get others to trust you unless you trust yourself first. Your message will not be convincing to others unless its convincing to you. Whenever someone tries to influence us, we ask ourselves, Can I trust this person? Do I believe him? Is she really concerned about me? We are less likely to be influenced if we sense that the person is driven solely by self-interest. Never assume that people trust you. Always show the world you are someone to be trusted, no matter what the circumstances are. You can gain and enhance trust by doing the following: Keep your promises Be reliable Under-promise and over-deliver Admit your failures and weaknesses Use logic with your emotion Exhibit true concern for and about others Never assume people completely trust you Tell people only as much as theyll believe Tell the truth, even if it hurts Downplay any benefits to you The Five Cs of Trust, as listed above, will all help you gain the trust you need to have lasting influence. Let me illustrate how these elements work in a story. Imagine youre experiencing extreme tooth pain. Youve put off going to the dentist as long as possible, but now natures telling you your time has run out. You recently relocated, so your previous dentist is 2,000 miles away and no longer an option. You ask your new friends and neighbors about their dentists and get the following five responses: 1. My dentist has great character. He is one of the most honest people I know. Hes not very competent, though. I heard hes famous for sticking the needle completely through your cheek. Would you go to this dentist? 2. My dentist is one of the top dentists in the state. Hes extremely competent, but kind of a crook. He has no character. Hes been caught a few times for over billing and also sometimes fills more cavities than you actually have. Would you go to this dentist? 3. My dentist doesnt have much confidence in his work. One time he said to me, Ive never been very good at reading x-rays. I feel unsure about whether I should give you a root canal or just leave the tooth alone. Look at this x-ray and tell me what you think. Would you go to this dentist? 4. Im not sure my dentist is licensed. I didnt see any degree or diplomas on his wall, and no one seems to know where he went to school. His office doesnt have the latest equipment. He even asked me to pay cash instead of writing a check. He has no credibility in my book. Would you go to this dentist? 5. My dentist is a nice guy, but he doesnt keep his stories straight. Congruency and consistency are not his strong suits. Last year he said Id probably have to get a root canal on my molar the next time I came in. When I came back, I asked him about the root canal on my molar, and he said, You dont need a root canal on that tooth. Who told you that? Would you go to this dentist? Im sure you would spend more time trying to find a dentist who met all five criteria. A deep and lasting sense of trust will not exist without all five characteristics being present. We know if a person is lacking in just one of these areas, it will affect every aspect of their ability to build, gain, and maintain trust. Do People Trust You ? Gallup poll on Trust and Honesty Pharmacist -- 64% Clergy -- 59% Medical doctors -- 57% College teachers -- 53% Policeman -- 49% Bankers -- 30% Journalists -- 22% Business exec -- 21% Stock brokers -- 19% Congressman -- 17% Real estate agents -- 16% Lawyers -- 14% Insurance sales -- 11% Advertisers -- 10% Car sales -- 5% Conclusion Learning how to persuade and influence will make the difference between hoping for a better income and having a better income. It is the missing puzzle piece that will crack the code to dramatically increase your income, improve your relationships, and help you get what you want, when you want, and win friends for life. Ask yourself how much money and income you have lost because of your inability to persuade and influence. Think about it. Sure youve seen some success, but think of the times you couldnt get it done. Has there ever been a time when you did not get your point across? Were you unable to convince someone to do something? Have you reached your full potential? Are you able to motivate yourself and others to achieve more and accomplish their goals? What about your relationships? Imagine being able to overcome objections before they happen, know what your prospect is thinking and feeling, feel more confident in your ability to persuade. |
